Podcast #4: New Year’s resolutions – goals and time management for 2025

How many New Year’s resolutions do people actually keep? Is there any way to quantify that percentage or do you have experience of how many people are successful?

I’ve seen various stats, but I wouldn’t like to pigeonhole things too much because it’s a very individual issue. I think it is important to think about why people make resolutions and what they want to achieve. It’s not about how many of them they actually do or don’t fulfil, it’s about why they make them in the first place and what the purpose of that behaviour is.

Realistic goals help us break tasks down into manageable steps and see incremental improvement, which boosts our self-confidence. Should we take it easy or jump straight to the big challenges?

Every wall or house is built brick by brick. That is the best metaphor for anything that requires some work and is intended to lead to some result. Big challenges can discourage us, exhaust us, but when we take one step at a time, we immediately have more motivation, energy and desire.

It’s less discouraging because if we fail at something small, it’s still better than failing at something big. It’s taking a few steps in a row that has really positive effects. And that’s just one tip that motivates us to keep our resolutions.

If I have a lot of goals and big ambitions, is it better to divide them into smaller steps? Usually we tend to go for everything at once, because we want everything – preferably here and now.

Exactly. But when I want everything, right away and all at once, it’s not a long-term solution. We will always get to that long-term goal in simple steps and systematical work. There are some things we can’t rush, they just take time. Moreover, and I like to say this a lot in therapy to clients – the journey itself is the goal.

If I have many goals, how do I know which one is most important to me?

Deciding where to start is one of the most difficult questions. And I don’t just mean in New Year’s resolutions, but in other areas as well. What do you prioritize by? I say to my clients that we are the authors of our goals and we should naturally know why we formulate and set them. If we don’t know, we can work with a psychologist to figure it out.

I find questions such as “What is my goal, why do I want to achieve it?”, ” If I don’t succeed, will I be sad or will I get over it with ease?”, “What is the purpose of my behaviour, why do I want to achieve it?” to be helpful. I very much like to ask this question in therapy: “If I asked you a year from now the same question I’m asking you now, would you have an answer to it? Would you have achieved your goal?” It’s very difficult, but it can be broken down into small pieces. Step by step, we can then arrive at answers we didn’t know before.

When is a goal too distant to reach?

Some goals are impossible to quantify, but I would say that a goal is too distant to reach if the mere thought of it or its formulation creates feelings of anxiety or inadequacy in us. When it occurs to us that I can’t do it, that I’m going to fail here. Alternatively, that I’m going to need too much effort and I’m tired of it, and I haven’t even started working towards that goal yet. In such cases, we can talk about the goal being really too far away to reach, beyond our capabilities.

How to estimate whether a goal will motivate us in the long run or will exhaust us very quickly?

We can never know for sure, because our motivation can change. But whether or not it will motivate us in the long run does not depend on that particular goal, but rather on our setting, our beliefs.

Motivation is our internal matter. We have to know why we do things and when we know that, we are naturally motivated. When we stop enjoying it, the motivation goes down and we just move on to something else. There’s no need to stay in places that we no longer enjoy or find fulfilling.

How do you stay motivated for the long term? Can you recommend some practical tips to help us stay on track? What helps people stick to their goals so that they don’t sabotage themselves in achieving them?

Above all, don’t overdo the beginning. Take your time and proceed slowly. Imagine not only the goal itself, but also the journey that awaits you. Set your goals in moderation so that they are realistic and achievable.

In therapy, I really like to work with clients on self-love: to be kind to yourself and not just listen to the inner critic that pushes you down and tends to sabotage things. And it also helps a lot when you make a plan and reward yourself at the end.

When our motivation drops, is it better to surround ourselves with motivated people or watch a motivational video? What can get us going again?

It depends. For someone, watching a motivational speaker or a successful person will help. Conversely, someone finds it frustrating and feels even worse. Their inner critic is loud – I don’t have it this way, why can’t I have it that way?

I think we should start with ourselves. That is, when our motivation drops, we need to understand why it happened to us and what we can do about it, how it affects us, how it makes us feel. And then in the next steps we can be inspired by some motivational speakers, for example. But let’s always start with ourselves – I think that’s the most cathartic thing to do. Because looking first at others before ourselves can be effective, but not always.

How to plan our days when we’re not feeling our best? How to overcome ourselves?

There is an oxymoron, a contradiction, in the question itself. Why should I outdo myself when I don’t feel my best? Why should I perform if I have to slow down? People nowadays lose compassion for themselves and fail to take care of themselves. Why can they take care of others but not themselves? Even on a plane, I should put the mask on myself first and then other people.

The goal is not to burn out and still be productive. The goal is to feel satisfied and happy. To be kind to yourself. Because otherwise we’re prone to burnout. And we do not want this.

What do people who achieve their goals do differently than most of us?

These people have clearly defined goals. These goals make sense to them, they know why they are doing it. And these goals are incremental, not big, megalomaniacal. At the same time, these people have a specific plan to achieve them. They enjoy the journey itself, and they enjoy the mistakes and missteps they make along the way. Because that’s part of the game too. They have good time management and know how to prioritize.

And very importantly, they relax and allow themselves to make a mistake and fail. They accept that not every performance has to be 100%. They know that they can make mistakes and that things can go wrong. Because that’s part of life too.

There are many techniques to succeed. Which time management techniques do you find most effective?

As you say, there are many time management techniques defined by experts. I like the classic to-do lists the best – to-do lists where a person ticks off what they’ve done, what they haven’t done, puts it on paper so it doesn’t get stuck in their head. I find it the most efficient and it’s worked for me all my life.

At the same time, the most effective way of time management is to plan my activities, i.e. when I will do what, so that I have order and structure, I can think about my rest and activities with other people. And Pareto’s 80:20 rule works quite well too – not wanting 100% of everything, but keeping some balance in it all.

Dominika, which time management technique will suit our listeners best?

I can’t determine what will suit ours listeners because it’s very individual. But there are several techniques – for example, the Pomodoro technique or the Time Boxing technique. Personally, I was very interested in the GTD – Getting Things Done technique, which focuses on completing individual tasks.

GTD consists of five simple steps that teach a person to plan effectively, prioritize and set realistic goals. The first step is RECORDING, or writing down every task that comes to mind. The second is CLARIFYING which task is accomplishable TODAY in specific steps. The third is to ORGANIZE, that is, to categorize the tasks and put them into contexts – for example, this is a task from the Work category, this one is from the Home category, this one is from the Friends category, and so on. The fourth point is to REFLECT, that is, to run through your list from time to time to see which tasks are done for the week or which are a priority and have not been done yet. Well, the last step is to ACT – it’s time to get down to work, don’t think too much about it, don’t organize, don’t plan, just start working.

I also recommend the book Getting Things Done by David Allen. It is really exceptional. Do you think it is good to plan every hour of the day or rather to work with a looser time frame?

Again, it’s very individual. Both methods have their advantages and disadvantages. They can also alternate depending on what our days look like. I really like to have one busy day at work full of therapy sessions and then an easy day when I come in for a podcast, for example. It very much depends on the personality, but also on the context or what is going on at the moment.

Dominika, could you explain what is digital detox or dopamine detox and what do you think about these trends?

Yes, these are very fashionable concepts. There was even a Digital Detox movement started in America in 2010 in response to the growing use of smartphones and other smart devices, as well as the growing importance of social networking and the constant access to the online world.

Digital detox is designed to reduce stress and over-stimulation. Digital detox is also related to compulsive behaviour that is caused by the use of technology. Common digital stressors include spending long hours in front of the TV, excessive consumption of online media content, or excessive smartphone use. This is a very important topic that I think rises to the top of what clients in therapy, or people in their lives in general, are dealing with.

How should we divide our time so that we also pursue personal goals, not just work?

We have control over how we make choices and what we pay attention to. And although it may sound complicated, if we care about something, we can squeeze it into our schedule quite easily. For example, if we want to go exercise, we can do it before or after work. In collaboration with a colleague or boss, we can allocate work efficiently. In my opinion, it’s not such a big deal to divide our time when we are aware of what we want, why we want it, where it can get us, and what we need to do to get it.

Is it a good idea to keep work and personal life strictly separate or should I give myself more room for spontaneous decisions?

What would you gain if you strictly separated them and if you didn’t separate them? Spontaneity can arise in both cases, there are pluses and minuses. It always depends on the individual person and what suits them better.

Sometimes work and personal life overlap, other times we strictly separate them. When we’re dealing with something serious in our family, either positive or negative – planning a wedding, having a baby, or being sick – that’s when we have the motivation to separate the two more strictly. If something like that is happening to us, it’s okay if it overlaps, as long as it’s okay for us.

What can happen if we neglect personal goals in favour of professional ones?

This can be a big problem. A lot of people come in frustrated that they wanted to achieve something else. They feel like they’ve failed, that their life is meaningless, that they’re dissatisfied and everyone else around them is happy.

However, it is important to remember that I AM responsible for my life and my decisions. If a personal goal is important to me, how is it possible that I have forgotten it? How is it possible that it has been overridden by something else? I need to go back to this in self-reflection and figure out if it was my honest personal goal, or if it was pressure from those around me and I just thought it was my goal. When I take the time to think such thoughts, they can reveal the answers to my questions.

If we feel that time is just passing by, how can we set boundaries and divide our responsibilities?

We have to prioritize – what do I need to do, what can wait, why do I need to do it today, can I put it off until tomorrow, where do I start, what do I continue. Time never stops. Sometimes it seems to go faster than it should, we can’t control it. What we can control, however, is how we set boundaries, how we prioritize, and how we divide those responsibilities. That is our greatest responsibility. And time – forget about it, let it go.

Finally, Dominika, I would like to ask you to summarize the points. How can we set our goals correctly so that we can easily manage them? So that we do not have unrealistic expectations and so that we move nicely step by step throughout the year to where we want to be?

Start with the right setup in mind. As we said – small goals, one step at a time or Pareto’s 80/20 rule. Then create an action plan of what you want to achieve, how you want to achieve it, and why you want to achieve it so it makes sense to you. Start practicing compassion and kindness towards yourself so that if something does accidentally go wrong, your world doesn’t come crashing down.

Allow yourself to make mistakes and missteps and fail. Take life easy so it’s not just about chasing goals and achieving them. I understand that everyone wants to fulfill their potential, develop and achieve their goals. But we have a limited number of years in this world, and if it’s always just about that, many times ordinary moments and little things slip through our fingers and sadly, they won’t happen again.

Only we can influence our success. What is the first step we should take this year to make it happen?

It is very important to realize that I am responsible for my life, my behaviour and experience, and for the change itself. Without this awareness we will not move far and we will be disappointed. When people come to therapy, they expect the psychologist to tell them how to change and ideally to make that change for them. But that’s not how it works. We hold the change in our own hands, and we need to start with that awareness.

I keep my fingers crossed for everyone facing some change. The symbolic beginning of it does not have to be a new year. We can start at any time – whether it’s January 1 or October 31. Everyone has their time.

Dear listeners, thank you for joining us today and listening to the episode –

From Plans to Reality: Goals and Time Management for 2025. My guest today was Dominika Neprasova. Dominika, thank you for accepting our invitation and sharing your valuable experience and advice with us. I hope that we will meet again on other topics.

Thank you very much, Ivka. My fingers are crossed for all listeners in their New Year’s resolutions and I look forward to the next podcast!

My name is Ivana Hricova and I hope that after today’s episode you will find it easier to set your plans and manage them with ease. In the new year of 2025 your msg life Slovakia wishes you endless strength, determination, courage in every step you take. May every day become an opportunity for your growth, success and the fulfilment of your dreams. We believe that this year will be yours. And remember that every small step forward brings you closer to your big goals!